


Random Stories About Volleyball Nerds

by Sirianna123



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-01 14:08:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16286048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sirianna123/pseuds/Sirianna123
Summary: Collection of Haikyuu! oneshots based on those rondom prompts one can find in the Internets.





	1. What is weakness anyway

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A switches sugar and salt before B wakes up. Later B makes their coffee before even looking an A's general direction and dumps a butt load of "sugar" into it before drinking it. A is fighting back laughter and tears until they realize B is giving them a death glare while drinking entire 16 oz. cup of salty coffee because they are the alpha and what is weakness anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found all those prompts ages ago and I don't remember where they just kind of sat there on my computer.

In theory, the prank was great. Bokuto was sure Akaashi would at the very least smile before asking for next coffee which he, the greatest senpai and boyfriend in the world would gladly provide him with and then offer to make him breakfast. At least in theory. Bokuto Koutaro wasn't great with theory and his plans often failed. He knew it, but he would not get dejected by a couple of fails. Akaashi always smiled even when it failed, especially when Bokuto's plans failed. He would not laugh... not much anyway.  
  
Waking up before Akaashi woke up was the first hurdle Bokuto had to defeat. Lucky for him it was Sunday and Akaashi always slept longer on Sunday's. Being an athlete with a strict practice schedule and morning exercise Bokuto always woke up at six what gave him an hour to make coffee for his beloved boyfriend and to prepare for breakfast and another cup.  
  
Hearing Akaashi walk out of the bedroom good half hour earlier gave Bokuto less time to prepare but he would prevail. It was to make Akaashi smile.  
  
"Koutarou why are you up and in the kitchen so early?" Akaashi asked and yawned widely.  
  
"I always wake up early'" Bokuto pouted but then smiled when offering him coffee.  
  
.................  
  
Akaashi just nodded and yawned again. Even half-awake he could see Bokuto was planning something. He would never miss cuddling with Akaashi on Sunday morning. Bokuto Koutrarou was a massive cuddler and was really nice to be cuddled by.  
  
When given an owl-shaped cup of coffee Akaashi glared at it and then looked at Bokuto who went back to kitchen proper after murmuring something about making them breakfast. Bokuto usually avoided cooking like fire. It was all suspicious. "I already put the sugar in," Bokuto nearly screamed when Keiji asked for it.  
  
The first sip after mixing the coffee was enough to tell Akaashi what was wrong. Salty. Very salty.  Has Bokuto mixed salt and sugar again? No, the boxes were now labelled after salty sugar cookies incident in February...  
  
A look at Bokuto over the rim of the cup later Akaashi knew it was a prank. It was actually kind of cute how he was doing his best not to laugh and to pretend he wasn't looking. Fighting a desire to sigh Akaashi drank the whole 16 oz. cup of hot salty coffee looking at Bokuto the whole time. It was about time Bokuto was reminded who's the man in their relationship.  
  
"Another cup, and with sugar, it's in the blue box, not yellow," Akaashi requested with a smile. He didn't feel like smiling, salty coffee was worse than plain bitter coffee, but it didn't matter. After dealing with Bokuto and all his weaknesses Akaashi might have forgotten what normal human weaknesses were. But it didn't matter as long as he got some of Bokuto's pancakes, which was one of few dishes his boyfriend could make without setting the pan on fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it. Comments are welcome.


	2. Friday the 13th

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At some point, it was meant to be a stand-alone fic, and it still may with changes. If I find notes for it somewhere on my desk...

13 of March would soon become Tsukishima Kei's least favourite day of the year. He might have even started to hate spring all together while he was at it. The point was he had a bad feeling driving to work one fateful Friday. And that he hated many things. Like his family, some of his co-workers, his noisy neighbours. Adding a thing or two to the list would change nothing for him.

The first sign of a shitty day was dark, heavy clouds covering the whole sky. And he just had to forget his umbrella. Not that it mattered, he was going to the station by car anyway, in his full police uniform. Yes, Tsukishima Kei was a policeman no matter what his personality and surname may suggest. But that wasn't important right now. What was important was the fact that Kei was feeling grumpier than usually. He didn't want to go to morning roll call. He wanted to stay at home and not worry about serial killers or his boss and co-workers. He hasn't become a policeman to deal with this shit.

When he was parking it was already starting to rain. Slow, lazy drops fell on his glasses and decided to stick around. Tsukishima didn't feel like wiping them the whole way to the building so he just grabbed his bag and walked a bit faster than usual. Just passing the door he noticed something weird. Bokuto Koutaro and Kuroo Tetsuro haven't jumped him as soon as he walked in. Actually, they were nowhere to be seen. That was weird. They jumped Tsukishima every single morning. Not that he cared.

Ignoring the fact he left his bag and went for the morning roll call. Some people were already sitting there and talking. For Tsukishima it was just a formality. He always gets either a boring patrol, parking duty or he sits in the office as 'backup'. That's what one gets from having a family like his. Not that he cared. Tsukishima Kei cared for little things. His biggest concern was his neighbours battling in out moaning each other every night. Students got it easy.

He's got two pairs of neighbours, well pairs might be an understatement. His upstairs neighbour technically lived alone, his boyfriend was just sleeping over from time to time... Almost every fucking day. Iwaizumi was not bad but that made him annoying. Oikawa was annoying by default. His downstairs neighbours were just as bad if not worse, no they were definitely worse. Arguing and shouting all the time, it was a wonder that they were still together.

"Okay men, calm down," Chief Ukai silenced them in a second. "Most of today will be a continuation from yesterday with exception of few cases. Narita, Kinoshita, you'll be replacing Kuroo and Bokuto since they stayed overtime yesterday. Oyasu parking duty. Tsikishima to my office." he said quickly and left leaving Kei with little choice but to follow him leaving his whispering co-workers behind.

Walking he wondered what his boss might have wanted from him. Opening the door he sighed heavily, mentally preparing himself to look for a different job. Walking in he noticed that Ukai wasn't alone. 

A bony guy around Tsukishima's age was sitting on a chair. He was looking at handcuffs around his wrists. Tsukishima had to fight an urge to get as far from him as possible. Something in his calm, gentle, outright delicate and girly, freckled face, and big brown eyes screamed danger. 

"You called boss?" Kei asked ignoring the guy.

"Yes. Sae sent them in," Ukai ordered his secretary.

In just a second Yamaguchi Takeshi, an influential businessman and popular politician walked in with his wife, Yamaguchi Tomoe, and glared at a guy in the corner, then Tsukishima and then Ukai. 

"Hello dad, hello mum. Look at those, ain't they neat?" freckles smiled showing off his handcuffs. He was completely ignored.

"So, regarding that letter..." Takeshi started.

"Yes, we'll be leaving Tadashi with Tsukishima..." Ukai said and Kei saw the instant reaction on faces of Yamaguchi's. "I assure you he can survive and..."

"That's not what I mean!"

"I can assure you that he has nothing to do with his family. Not to mention that he has the highest mental fortitude of all my men. If someone can keep your son safe it's him." Ukai assured them and having no more complaints they left not even looking at Tadashi once.

Tsukishima just looked at his boss. He couldn't be serious, there was absolutely no way. Son. Yamaguchi. This could mean only one thing. Was he to protect a serial killer from another serial killer? No way, not in his shitty apartment, this guy is going to get angry on the first night and shank his neighbours. "No," Tsukishima muttered, "No." He has heard about Yamaguchi. At least twenty murders. At LEAST TWENTY. And he was moved out of prison to live in perfect isolation house arrest when he made a guard try to gauge his own eye out, his cellmate hung himself. And he won't mention all the other prisoners he drove half mad with just TALKING. No matter how much mental fortitude he had there was no way.

"No," he repeated turning to leave.

"You're doing it. It's already decided," Ukai said and moved to undo Yamaguchi's handcuffs. "Now out I have work. And till we catch this copycat avenger all you have to do is watch this guy, you may stay at home."

And like this Tsukishima got into the biggest mess of his life and had a feeling that it's only going to get worse and worse.  
After leaving the office they went to get Yamaguchi's bag what wasn't easy considering how much the guy was talking.

"So I take it you're related to THOSE Tsukishima's, you know, the Yakuza," Tsukishima ignored it but that did not discourage him. "Have you got any tattoos? Why have you joined the police? What are you usually doing? Ne, Tsukki?"

"What?" Tsukishima growled hearing the nickname. This was a ridiculous thing to get angry over. He knew it but it still ticked him off for some reason.

"Your surname is too long and I don't think you'd appreciate me using your given tame, would you Kei?" Yamaguchi said, "Oh look, it's raining," he carried on rambling as Tsukishima was gathering what strength he got left.

"Don't ever use my name," he mumbled walking into the rain.

"It's either this or Tsukki, I'm not using your ridiculously long surname," Tadashi protested following him closely.

Muttering 'whatever' Tsukishima put the bag in the trunk and pushed Yamaguchi to the passenger seat.

"Ne, Tsukki~" Yamaguchi hummed as Tsukishima was starting the car, "What's for dinner?"

"Take out," short and simple answer. He had nothing to make dinner, he didn't even remember the last time he was grocery shopping. Two weeks ago? Possible.

"I could cook," he asked making Tsukishima abruptly stop the car and muttered short 'huh?'. "Y'know, make food? I promise not to poison you," He added.

This would mean going shopping, in his uniform, with a serial killer. What was his other choice? Stick by the takeout idea. Yamaguchi got none of it, he even threatened to kill the delivery man if Tsukishima dared to go with the plan. So with a heavy sigh, without a chance to change out of his uniform Tsukishima silently drove to the nearest supermarket. On the second thought, he should have driven to the other end of the town. At least people he knew weren't working there. 

Good thing - the person he personally knew wasn't at work at that time. Bad thing - currently working cashier knew the person he knew. Hopefully, they hadn't noticed him pushing a cart with Yamaguchi practically hanging off of his harm listing what he can cook and asking Tsukishima what he would like. Hearing whatever he decided on curry and then pasta for Saturday and a homemade pizza for Sunday. "It's much better than taking out," he advertised himself.

Shopping turned out to be quite normal if not Yamaguchi behaving like they were a couple and then insisting to pay. How a guy who was under solitary house arrest for last three years had money was unknown to Kei and he preferred to not know it. What he would want was for rain to stop. It was starting to annoy him more than Yamaguchi's rambling. At least he got off the topic of Yakuza.

Moving the bag and groceries took three walks up the stairs to the third floor. Leaving Yamaguchi alone in the kitchen with knives felt weird but he had to kind of trust him that he won't kill anyone. Locking the door and carrying the key around should, for now, suffice as a safety measure.

When he came back in loose jeans and plain T-shirt Yamaguchi looked at him disapprovingly. "Did you have to take your uniform off?" he asked. He sounded disappointed.

"I don't have a habit of wearing it at home. Got any problem with that?" Kei was already having enough. His usually pristine, never used kitchen looked like a war zone.

"What can I say, uniforms are one of my few weaknesses. And if they are worn by tall, handsome men in glasses... I'm down," he hummed happily and pushed Tsukishima out of the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it. Comments and kudos are welcome.


End file.
